From an email signature:
“Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.”
Notice I didn’t tag this as “humor”.
April 24, 2008 – 10:07 pm
Hi. I’m Andy Skelton. Nobody special. I’d like to learn your name and get to know you and I’ll tell you why right now.
It’s often said that you don’t get a second chance to make a first impression. I just now realized that I have always arrogantly believed my intuition about people based on a mere first impression, a momentary experience that will be tainted by microsecond subconscious attempts to match you with others from my memories.
You haven’t ever spoken to me or met me but I have heard you and seen you. You made an impression. Everything you did, your look, your words, and your tone reminded me of people I have known who were complete assholes. Thus my intuition was that you were a complete asshole.
Wait. Let me back up a little. Those people might not have been assholes in their lives, but they were assholes in my life. Some of them became assholes over time and some became some of the best people in my life. First impressions are not permanent.
See, what’s happening for me right now is that I’m becoming less of an asshole myself because I am giving us another chance to see eye to eye. I reviewed my entire experience of you and I see now that there is room for doubt. For all I know, you could be the nicest person in the world.
That’s why I want to know you. Take my card. If you don’t want to talk to me right now, talk to me when you do. I’ve invaded your time and space enough. Please just tell me your name.
Wise Bread told me how to get a free Swingline stapler. It’s not Milton’s red stapler but I did have my eye on staplers at the store, so I was interested.
The survey starts with an email address and at some point they’ll collect your mailing address. There was no link to a privacy policy so I went looking and found one after about two minutes. It said they will email me, send me literature, and share my info with other companies.
I pictured myself shredding sheafs of junk mail while grumbling at my shiny new stapler. How much would my free stapler cost me? If I can get ACCO to take me off their sharing and promo lists, not much. I took the survey.
What should happen to Bear Stearns?
He should die. Keep it simple.
Who is Bear Stearns?
I’m not really sure… good follow-up question.
As Switters said: the more advertising I see, the less I want to buy (Tom Robbins). I am no fortress, however. This appealed to me:
…you freeloading “Internet generation” types should subscribe to the damned magazine already, for the so-low-it’s-sinful price of $19.97 per year.
Now I subscribe to Reason online and in print.